All I want is to meet and befriend someone who will not get sick of me, or decide that my depression is ‘too much of a handful’ for them… And who will not go behind my back and begin hanging out with my ex boyfriend within a month of us breaking up. That would be so nice. I’m just so tired of being disposable to the people that I truly cannot live without…
“She was still waiting for him to come back to her, even though he wasn’t going to. She was still holding out for something that wasn’t going to happen. She was good at waiting. That seemed like a sad thing to be good at.
” by Ann Brashares
(Source: 99lions)
I don’t know what happened, but now we don’t exist. There is you and there’s me, but never us. There is the three thousand six hundred and thirty four miles, and there is the stars that we both look at but never really see and there is that time near the gravel road where we picked dandelions and later fell asleep smoking marlboros beneath the trees, but there is not an us anymore. Not that “us” ever really existed, but it was just so lovely to hold the thought on the tip of my tongue and just so pleasant to think that when you played with my palm and whispered that you loved me, that you might have even meant it. It was nice to pretend.
(Source: postelle)
“She never gives a straight answer, always hiding behind a curtain of vague words and round about phrases. She walks in circles, always just out of reach. They call her manipulative, evasive, always twisting what people say to suit her needs, but she’s not like that, not really. She just doesn’t know how not to speak in riddles, how not to build mazes and paradoxical labyrinths with every word she say, because it’s so ingrained into every fiber of her being. It’s a defense mechanism, really, more than anything. When people attack her, when they laugh and scoff at her, she withdraws within herself ans spits out sentences that seem to mean everything and nothing all at once. It’s a defense mechanism, because if they can’t find her behind the haziness she’s constructed around herself, they can’t touch her, can’t even hurt her, even if sometimes they’re right when they call her pretentious or false or deceitful. It’s hard to tell which started the other, if she’s like this because they pick apart at her or if they scratch at her until her heart bleeds because she makes mazes. her life is something of a web of intricacies just like her speech, but she doesn’t know how to do differently, doesn’t know how to stop.
” by Isabella Sunday (via
suavium)
(Source: larmoyante, via immortels)
Oh I love the smell of rain…
“Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell.
” by Edna St. Vincent Millay
(Source: larmoyante, via thenakedbrowneye)
“It’s not my fault I can’t be like you, okay? I don’t get up in the morning thinking the world is one big, shiny, happy place, okay? That’s just not how I work. I don’t think I can be fixed.
” by Lauren Oliver,
Before I Fall(Source: vanished)
How is it that falling out of love with someone can hurt so much, especially when you’re not even a part of their life anymore, and you know they no longer care about you?
“I am free of all prejudice; I hate everyone equally.
” by Unknown
(Source: thekristinator)
FUCK
I need to stop loving him, but I fucking can’t. I’m too pathetic… It’s been six months already and I still spend all day, every day, crying my fucking heart out. I’m really scared this will never get better… He was my angel. I just still can’t believe we’re not together anymore. Every day I wake up hoping that October 10th was just a dream, and every day I have to come to terms with the fact that it was not… I really do hope it’s true that each cigarette you smoke takes 5 to 20 minutes off your life, because I’ve been smoking like fiend, and doing every unhealthy, life-risking activity I can think of since he decided his life truly was much better with me no longer in it. I know it’s stupid, but he was it for me, and since I can’t make him love me anymore, all I can do is hope that tragedy comes to save me…
